Granting Permission to Die
An important step in the Death Rites is giving a loved one permission to die. Let them know that there is no reason to worry about those who stay behind.
Without receiving permission to die, your loved one might cling to life for months, enduring unnecessary suffering and causing great anguish for the family. Permission from those closest to the person carries the most weight, even if it is a personal friend or confidant and not an immediate family member. However, permission must come from the immediate family, and ideally there should be a consensus. If there is a dissenting family member who won’t let go, encourage him to express his love and forgiveness nonetheless. Many times the family members who have the hardest time letting go are the ones who have the most unfinished business with the dying person or who are the most frightened of their own death.
Countless cases talk about the importance of this step. Alberto tells the story of a student of his who sat beside her dying mother for weeks. The mother was unable to let go, despite the fact that she was in a great deal of pain and could no longer eat. The student had cleansed her mother’s chakras, and she and her sister had begun to forgive each other and heal the lesions of the past. She finally said, “Mother, we are here with you and love you very much. We want you to know that we will be okay. We will look after each other and keep our family together. Even though we will miss you, it is perfectly natural for you to go. We will treasure all of the beautiful moments that we had together, but we don’t want you to suffer anymore, or to continue to cling to life. You have our full and complete permission to die. You know that we will always love you.” A few hours later her mother took her final breath and died peacefully.